Every time I sing this song it brings tears to my eyes…

It doesn’t matter where I am… at home, in rehearsal, in the car or on stage, when I sing this song, I begin to weep…

I love this song.

I remember when I first heard it on an old recording that my mom had.  And I loved the words so much, so I asked her to teach it to me.  And my mom began to sing while I listened at her feet.

I could see that this song held much emotion for her.  She had tears in her eyes as she sang, and I knew that there was an important story behind this old Armenian folk song.

In this song, the bride-to-be is thanking her mother for all the care, guidance, and love she has showered upon her daughter.  And at the end of the song, she is asking her mother for a blessing before she leaves home to be married…  my grandmother used to sing Hars Em Knoom before she was married, my mom tells me… and my mom sang this folk song before she was married, getting ready to leave home to come to Canada.  But her mom, my grandmother had already passed away.  She remembers my grandfather disliking this song very much…”He always wanted me to stop singing it; he didn’t want to lose me like he had lost his wife…”  But my mom had to sing… she had to find a way to give voice to all the mixed emotions she was feeling as she prepared to leave the home she loved to move to a foreign land, as she prepared to begin a new life with her beloved, as she longed to share these joys, these times with her own mother…

As I sat at her feet and listened to her speak, I realized that it was now my turn to sing this song:  here I was on the verge of getting married and moving to a new country… another generation of the women in our family using an old folk song to tell our story…

I love my mom so much.  Her passion for life inspires me.  Her faith moves me deeply.  I love her laughter; I love her voice; I love her emotions.  And I love her singing.

This song speaks my heart so clearly…  “You loved me, you cared for me; The sea has taken all that you have sacrificed for me, dear Mother, and has given it to my beloved.”

Indeed. My mom has sacrificed much for us.  And she has done this with grace and selflessness, never trying to seek attention for herself.  I remember her glowing at my wedding, knowing full well that she was exhausted from all the preparations she had done… oh, but she simply shone.   And I also knew that her heart was full – full of joy and pain.  The joy of seeing me with my beloved… the pain of knowing that I would be leaving to go far, far away for the time being…

And from the look in her eyes, I knew that she was also remembering when she had sung this song before her wedding, before she had to move away… and at that moment, like with every song that she has taught me, she was remembering my grandmother…

All I had to do was look in her eyes.

I am going to be married

I will be leaving home

I am a 17 year old bride to be, my dear Mother

And I will be with my beloved.

May your blessing, my dear Mother

remain on me forever…

Tags: A Bride's Song, Armenian folk song, Detroit, grandmother, Hars Em Knoom, love, mothers, moving from home, recording, rehearsal, singing, song, stage, storytelling